The Great Escape

I have reality blues today! Last week hubby and I went on holiday for a whole 5 days to Plettenberg bay. We have not gone away from home in ages. Having SIX furchildren make it quite tough. The first day was very very tough. I was having silent panic attacks. It was raining. The babysitter for some reason did not come after we left and only came home really late that night. I was stressing so much. It was horrible. I even got angry and regretful. It was genuinely a very tough day.
BUT thankfully I made it through. The next 3 days were blissfully adventurous! It was amazing. I was excited to get up in the morning. I overcame some scary obstacles. I did crash in the afternoons but a quick deep nap cured it. There were some moments where I could feel my mood change, I analysed it, had a snack and hydrated and pushed through til I could get to the nap.
On one particular loooong hot hike I felt myself getting negative but I verbally voiced out loud that I was being ridiculous as the views were so breathtaking surely I could push through my discomfort to enjoy it.
I felt strong. I felt determined. I made all sorts of promises to myself that upon return I would just DO! Stop overthinking. Stop, stopping myself from accomplishing things I know I CAN do.
Which brings me to today. Ugh! It sucks adulting. I had to clean house, pack away stuff, do washing, move stuff back to its place (aka back to spare room / storage room which was cleaned for babysitter) etc etc.
I am so exhausted right now. My body hurts. My soul is tired. I have zero determination. It's like the second I arrived back home all the life got sucked out of me.
It seems like the tired I feel at home hurts and is unfair versus the tired I felt on holiday which I allowed myself to feel.
Oh and I did that race yesterday I was sort of training for. Ouch! It was not enjoyable at all. Pushes my negative thoughts even more to the forefront as I should be able to do such a short race easily but I couldn't.
I did not want to get up this morning as the list in my head of what I had to do was just too overwhelming. I have made a written list and will hopefully calmly and methodically get through each item one step at a time.

This post was suppose to be all about the great escape! But it wasn't....here is a pivotal monumentous captured memory though that sums up the awesomeness that was!
Snorkelling with Seals - how epic!!!